It’s been two hours since I was lying in the bed. The stream of thoughts flowing across my eyes was confining me into the safe of the sleepless nights.The only place that I feel all alone with myself, the self itself, just the body and just the mind without invading thoughts is the bathroom, all undisturbed.
My eyes close as I try not to think. My heart stops beating as I try not to see. I start to deform into someone I don’t recognize. Knowing that there is an always easy path and resisting not to choose it although it's really smooth bring me together. Choosing that path? Heh, it’s called superficiality. there is an imperceptibe line between these two and i'm definitely pushed really hard to walk through.
But I know with absolute certainty that I will reach the edge someday.
At some moments I look at me from a good safe distance and thats when I totally feel in hock then i'm perplexed.
I feel like i'm in a boundless void, there no colors in there, no sounds, no visions. I feel like i'm the most despondent, wretched person alive, so primitively i wanna cry out loud to at least hear my voice but in vain. I lay on the floor and wait for this everlastingly choking feeling would leave me. I lose the track of time, the flow of the hourglass switches to the stagnant mode..
ko falls into ad infinitum..
It takes a while for me to get out from this limbo.
*****
Those who don't have a seto tailing themselves like a prepacing shadow won't understand how i feel.
I temporally change;
as my prepacing firm shadow enlightens my route,
That's why i always surprise you and you always feel like meeting me for the first time.
My shadow is so much in light and that's what makes it so impossible, so incompatible:
a shadow that's so much in light.
I don't wanna know people. They are ugly. I don't know me, i don't know if i'm gettin ugly cos i'm getting alienated as the days pass and my feet are entangling as i walk.
Where is my shadow? Why is it always here just to fight?
Where are the friday nights?
HI?
My eyes close as I try not to think. My heart stops beating as I try not to see. I start to deform into someone I don’t recognize. Knowing that there is an always easy path and resisting not to choose it although it's really smooth bring me together. Choosing that path? Heh, it’s called superficiality. there is an imperceptibe line between these two and i'm definitely pushed really hard to walk through.
But I know with absolute certainty that I will reach the edge someday.
At some moments I look at me from a good safe distance and thats when I totally feel in hock then i'm perplexed.
I feel like i'm in a boundless void, there no colors in there, no sounds, no visions. I feel like i'm the most despondent, wretched person alive, so primitively i wanna cry out loud to at least hear my voice but in vain. I lay on the floor and wait for this everlastingly choking feeling would leave me. I lose the track of time, the flow of the hourglass switches to the stagnant mode..ko falls into ad infinitum..
It takes a while for me to get out from this limbo.
*****
Those who don't have a seto tailing themselves like a prepacing shadow won't understand how i feel.
I temporally change;
as my prepacing firm shadow enlightens my route,
That's why i always surprise you and you always feel like meeting me for the first time.
My shadow is so much in light and that's what makes it so impossible, so incompatible:
a shadow that's so much in light.
I don't wanna know people. They are ugly. I don't know me, i don't know if i'm gettin ugly cos i'm getting alienated as the days pass and my feet are entangling as i walk.
Where is my shadow? Why is it always here just to fight?
Where are the friday nights?
HI?
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